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Bowl hit for breakfast takes the edge off mediocrity i squeeze my tits together as i buy a newport loosie at the bodega but the arab doesn’t notice me, no one ever does as i prowl the streets hunting for half smoked cigarette butts, the occasional joint roach or tiny drug baggies filled with coke, molly or heroin residue. On cropsey avenue a bicyclist gets hit by a garbage truck and it takes a lot of effort not to get a hard on as i watch the twitching body lying in a wet red pool as a bunch of old russian guys film the whole thing on their smart phones. 20 minutes later the ambulance comes and i notice both EMT’s have cheetos dust all over their hero costumes. The fat garbage man who was driving the truck is saying, “i dindu nuffin wron” to an equally bloated cop whose bulging pelvis is barely contained in his own hero blouse, his pants zipper open with dried cum and piss stains all over the crotch.     

at a border crossing in peru a chubby young woman adorned with stretchmarks and an underdeveloped labia was caught attempting to smuggle drugs by stuffing a roll of them in her cunt. those drugs ended up becoming the 44th president of the untied states, mr president barack hussein obama II. lets play the prime time news drinking game every time they twist the reality narrative to suit the advertisers you have to kill yourself. the brain tumor might be cancerous i dunno cant afford the brain scan that i need to get it checked out anyway the less you know the less likely you are to die more or less